Life of a Loner..

Saturday, December 25, 2010

Me Getting Ready To Go...

Good Evening To All My Faithful Readers and Followers!
What a wonderful Christmas for me and for those around me because this year we decided to celebrate at Goldkist Beach Resort. All thanks to my dearest God Mother and her family.

And most importantly, I recieved the best & the most expensive christmas gift from someone. A (Ermenegildo Zegna Wallet) It was damn expensive. And it cost about $460 SGD.. Wow!! It was much More expensive then the Gucci Wallet that i've been longing for. And i would like to take this chance to express my sincere thanks and gratitute to that person. Thank You So Much.. .

Ermenegildo Zegna Wallet (My Christmas Gift)

I Love This Wallet TTFM.. LoLx

Well today the weather is quite bad cos it has been drizzling (Raining Cat and Dogs) for the whole day. But it doesn't stop us from enjoying ourself. Me and my cousins even went to the Beach for a splashing good time.. We played around and joked around. I even took off my everything and skin dip (NAKED).. hahaha... (It really feels good).. LoLx..

Then after awhile, all of us got tired, then we head back to the chalet to fill our hungry empty stomach. All thanks to my Dearest God Mum for preparing a sumptous dishes for us.. And now here i am sitting by the bed and updating my blog on my phatetic Lap Top (It's time to get a new lap top).. hehehe..

And i am quite thankful cos yesterday i had the chance to actually go for my peaceful time out at one of the water breaker along East Coast Beach. I've always wanted to do that and now finally i had the chance to do so. Although it was just for a short while, but it really give me peace and serenity. Maybe tonite if the weather is good, i'm gonna do it again..

Leaving My Footprint On The Sandy Beach

Me, Myself & I

RYAN.. Dats my Name..

Well dats all for now cos there's nothing much to update. Maybe if i got more things, i'll update again ok..

Best Regards and Wishes
RYAN

my say at 12/25/2010 08:57:00 PM.

Good Evening Everyone!

Just A Lil Pictorial Updates On My Latest Hairstyle and Colour.. Courtesy of my Personal Hairstylist (Ronald) I really love this new style and especially the colour. It's kinda look greyish. Initially it was a mixed of Ash Grey, Ash Green and Ash Blue.. Then after it faded, the colour became more obvious. It's a shades of Silver Grey.. Seriously.. I Love it TO THE FREAKING MAX.. hahaha.. Next i guess i wanna keep my hair long. As for colour wise, i've yet to decide... Following is the pics of my latest hairstyle...

(Me @ Billie Hair Studio)

(Sweet Smile OF Mine)

Hmm!! Good Looking Rite Me.. ANd I Love This Hairstyle of mine TTFM

my say at 12/25/2010 08:22:00 PM.

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Love Me, Hate Me Or Envy Me

I used to be this desperate guy are always searching for the perfect love. Love was the only thing that gave meaning to this life. When I fall in love, I give myself up completely and dive into the ocean with no second thoughts.

As expected, most of the time I almost drowned because they find my love too overwhelming. I couldn't blame them though. At least they put the misery to an end. With a proper closure, anyone can move on easier.

But there are few that are never strong enough to tell you it's over. And these are the worst kind anyone can ever meet because all they do is take advantage of your love and manipulate you like a doll.

They use you in many ways but never care about how you feel. When you're too close, they want you to back off. But when you're drifting away, they'll make you come back. And everytime you would because you love them.

I went through tough times but I understood love a little better than before. I no longer believe that "we fall in love" because love should lift you up instead. When I am loveable and you love me, it's fair trade. But when I don't deserve any love and you love me, that's unconditional love.

Love cannot be earned. It is a gift that you give to someone without any expectations. I came across this phrase a while back and I find it extremely enlightening.

"The more you love, the more you lose a part of you. Yet you do not become less of who you are. In fact, you end up being complete."

Yours Sincerely
<3 <3 <3 <3 <3
Ryan Hiroshi

Labels: Love

my say at 12/23/2010 03:52:00 PM.

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

(Specially Dedicated To The Love Of My Life. You Know Who You Are.. I LOVE YOU BABY)

The rush of love comes with age. When you are younger, you love with no degree of protection and give up your everything. However, when you're much older. You take things slow and only open up with time when trust is gained.

It's more sensible to love with caution but the thrill and excitement of engaging in a love frenzy is lost when you take precaution. Don't you wish you were a teenager again? (I definitely do)

Being a teenager, you pretty much just want to enjoy the moment rather than think about the future. Like how the saying always go "No regrets, just love". Seriously? But yes, deep down we all want to dive into that crazy and steamy love affair. Or is it Lust Affair?

How often does love find us? Honestly, if you disregard the flings. Love only happens a few times in a lifetime. Therefore, when love knocks at your door, brace up and let it in.

Love is a gift. Don't hold back the blessing you can give to the one you love. Give it all up... In the name of love.

I just wanna take this opportunity to tell the person whom i love alot dat i've no regret in loving him. And i promise to love him whole heartedly. He's the only one for me and the only one i'll ever want. (I LOVE YOU BABY!! I REALLY LOVE YOU TRULY, MADLY, DEEPLY)

Yours Sincerely
Ryan

my say at 12/22/2010 04:38:00 PM.

There are days when we're going through tough times and many things around us seem to be going against us. Even when we get home after a long day, your family, Nephew, Niece, Cousins etc seems to be getting on your nerves.

But these are the times when we will unintentionally hurt the people who care about us genuinely. People who want to listen to your complaints and share your burden. People who are always there for you when you least expected. But very often, we like to push these people aside. And hurt them by doing so.

We just want to be left alone. And being alone is just what i really want at that time...

But these are the times we might regret. These are the times we might never get to choose again. There might be no tomorrow. You'll not be able to get the second chance to choose them over yourself. (We can never be sure if we'll be able to wake up tomorrow to seee the sunshine)

As I grow older, I start noticing how fragile life is. How tomorrow I might not get the chance to tell the people I care about how much I love them. These are the times when I will suddenly pick up my phone and call them and tell them I love them.

Most of the time, they think I'm in trouble or that something had happened to me. But it's just because for that moment in time, I remembered how much I love them. And I didn't want to waste the chance to tell them that.

Many times, we often learn to treasure things only when they are gone. Why wait till then when you can take the active stance and treasure them now. Life is defined by the many moments that we have to make a decision.

Don't use second chances as an excuse. Treasure the moment. Tell the people you love how much you love them...

To all the people who i've hurt in the past, present and even the future. I am terribly sorry. I just want to tell you how much i love you and i really care lot about you. Whatsoever dat i've done is all unintentional. I Love You From The Verry Bottom Of My Heart..

Yours Sincerely
Ryan'iel Bae

my say at 12/22/2010 03:48:00 PM.

A very good evening everyone.
I know it has been a while since i last update my blog (I mean really really update it). I am terribly sorry for it cos for past few weeks, It has been a terrible downturn for me. I was stressed, frustrated, angry and terribly sick. I guess i need not elaborate further on it cos it'll just add salt to the open wound.

(Ah Bee & Me @ Skape)

Well! As i've mentioned, i've been sick for the past 1 week. High fever, Flu, Cough, Body Ache etc etc. And i think it was a caused of a viral infections. (Dunno where the hell did i get that from.. SHIT!!) And i did not go to work for many days due to my conditions. (All thanks to the freaking FEVER) And i really feel very bad about it. I feel guilty towards my friend (Ah Tong) who is still opening up the job for me despite my frequent absence.. (FML!!) I am so afraid of losing my job again. (I still couldn't get over the N.O.V incident.. FUCK YOU "ISFENDI SALLEH" I curse you rot in hell!!)

(Nana & Me)

(Halim & Me)

(Me & Nana @ Skape)

No matter what, sick or not, i have to push myself to go to work. I couldn't afford to be jobless cos i'm sure everyone are aware that i am a very independent sort. And i never rely on my family for anything. Infact i've been living independantly eversince i was 15 years old. And i intend to maintain it dis way for as long as i live. (Never ever to rely on anyone. But MYSELF)

All the thing dat i ever owned in the past, the present and hopefully in the future is all from the fruits of my labour. My sheer hardwork. My sweat and blood. I dun like to rely on anyone cos i believe in attaining satisfactions of pampering myself after working damn hard.

(Addy & Me @ Ferrero Tree)

(Joel, Me & Addy Chua)

This month is a super freaking fucked type month for me. I hate it to the core and seriously, I super hate 2010. Alot of unpleasant things occurs dis year especially this month. I just hope dat as 2010 end, all the unpleasant things will vanish together with it.

(Me & My Bro in Law)

Today is 21 December 2010 and in 10 days time as the clock strike midnite, It marks the new year. (2011). I really really hope that 2011 will be a much better year for me and everyone around me. I'll just hope for the best and expect for the worst.

I VOWS TO
1) Work Damn Hard, Earn Much More & Save More (For my Future)
2) Be a better person then what i am now (Spiritually)
3) Quit smoking (Since Last Year I Tried Unsucessfully)
4) Cut down on my partying (Less Drinking + Less Partying = Less Spending)
5) Find time to go for a backpacking trip (All Around Asia)
6) Start saving up for my dream car & House
7) Be a better son towards my mother (I've been very bad this year)
9) Be a good Boyfriend towards the lucky ones.. (Whoever he is, he knows it)

May God Answer All My Prayers And Makes My Wish Come True... Amin

(Me & My Dearest Niece Qu'raisha Shalin)

And at the same time, i also hopes for world peace and harmony. May the hunger will have food to eat, The jobless have jobs to earn, The Poor to get out of poverty and live normally, The Rich become more generous towards the unfortunate, The heartbroken are mended, The tears become laughter and All sadness vanish and eventually become Happiness.. Amin..

Well peeps!! I also would like to add up that i've met someone who love me alot. I feel so lucky but at the same time i feel guilty too cos i've not been treating him right. I dunno what is wrong with me. I've always say that (It's better to be loved then to love someone) But in the end i just literally waste it. I dunno what should i do. I'll just leave it open as it is and hopes time will change everything. (God Please Guide Me On This Please.. Amin)

To that person, i love you alot. It's just dat i dunno how to show it to you. I dun expect you to change for me. But at the very least, change it for us please. Change for the sake of our future. (You know who you are) and i am pretty sure most of my friends and relative know who exactly who you are cos i've been mentioning ur name alot lately. I just wanna tell you dat i love you so much and hopes it'll get further then what it is now..

Well dats all i can say for now.. Till we meet again in my next posting ok. I would like to take this opportunity to wish everyone a

(MERRY CHRISTMAS & A HAPPY NEW YEAR)

Yours Sincerely

Ryan

Labels: Love, Merry Christmas

my say at 12/22/2010 12:23:00 AM.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Lonely sidewalks, silent night
Bring the evening, deep inside
Hold me darling, touch me now
Let the feelings free tonight
Love is on the way
I can see it in your eyes
Let's give it one more try tonight baby
Love is on the way
I can see it in your eyes
Let's give it one more try tonight
Time of season, wipes your tears
No ryhme or reason, no more fears
And all the dreamin', is far behind
You are here now, and everythin's alright
Love is on the way
I can see it in your eyes
Let's give it one more try tonight baby
Love is on the way
I can see it in your eyes
Let's give it one more try tonight
And in the morning I'll be gone away
All the things I left behind
If you need me I'll come night and day
Let's stop the hands of time
Love is on the way
I can see it in your eyes
Let's give it one more try tonight baby
Love is on the way
I can see it in your eyes
Let's give it one more try tonight baby
Love is on the way
I can see it in your eyes
Let's give it one more try tonight baby
Love is on the way
I can see it in your eyes
Let's give it one more try tonight..

my say at 12/21/2010 10:45:00 PM.

Monday, December 20, 2010

Remember all the things we wanted
Now all our memories they're haunted
We were always meant to say goodbye

Even with our fists held high...
It never would've worked out right
We were never meant for do or die

I didn't want us to burn out
I didn't come here to hold you, now I can't stop

I want you to know that it doesn't matter
Where we take this road someone's gotta go
And I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better
But I want you to move on so I'm already gone

Looking at you makes it harder
But I know that you'll find another
That doesn't always make you want to cry

Started with a perfect kiss then
we could feel the poison set in
Perfect couldn't keep this love alive

You know that I love you so, I
Love you enough to let you go

I want you to know that it doesn't matter
Where we take this road someone's gotta go
And I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better
But I want you to move on so I'm already gone
I'm already gone, already gone

You can't make it feel right when you know that it's wrong
I'm already gone, already gone
There's no moving on so I'm already gone
Already gone, already gone, already gone
Already gone, already gone, already gone, yeah

Remember all the things we wanted
Now all our memories they're haunted
We were always meant to say goodbye

I want you to know that it doesn't matter
Where we take this road someone's gotta go
And I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better
But I want you to move on so I'm already gone

I'm already gone, already gone
You can't make it feel right when you know that it's wrong
I'm already gone, already gone
There's no moving on so I'm already gone

Yours SincerelyRyan'iel Bae

my say at 12/20/2010 06:54:00 PM.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Hello Everyone! I'm back again.. This month has been a terrible month for me and a few others. I've had my fair share of freaking hard life and downturns dis month. Work wise, relationship wise, Party wise etc etc.

The only consolation i had dis month is dat i passed my RTT with flying colours.

(Thanks God)

All the rest is just bad news for me.

Today is Thursday 16th December 2010. And we are 2 weeks away before the start of a new year. I really hopes dat 2011 will be a superb year for me and for everyone.

I am looking foward to better quality of lives in the year 2011.

1) A Very Good Job With Good Salary & Benefit

2) Long awaited Love Based Relationship

3) Change All My Wardrobe
4) More Family Based Outing

5) To Start Savings For My Dream Car

6) New iPhone 4 / iPhone 5 / iPad

7) Travel around asia (Backpacking) in 2011

8) My own cosy Bachelor Pad (Apartment) -

Cos i badly need my own personal space without getting bossed around by those low life disrespectful Idiot. (I need not mention names here)

May all my wishes became reality.. Amen

Well, My mind is kinda blank now cos i'm down with a terrible fever, flu and cought. All thanks to the weather. (Holy Shit).. I can't complain can i?

A little update about my latest partying scene lately..

Dis year Zouk-Out celebrates it's 10 year anniversary at Sentosa Siloso Beach. This year is the biggest event so far organize by Zouk which cost 2.6 million dollars to staged.

It attract lots of party people from over the world.

Where 45% of the patron are foreigner.

I think dis year, it has the biggest turnout so far with about 30,000 people attend the events.. Inlike last few years where only the maximum of 20,000 people are allowed. Due to high demands of ticket, there's also alot of people who resort to cheating by selling Fake Ticket to unsuspecting partygoers. In the end, approx about 4000 people are denied entry on the event day. (I wonder how much the idiot who sell the ticket earns).

Luckily i did not fall into the scam and dis year,

From all the media coverage of the events, It states dat this year events is the best so far ever staged. All thanks to (Tiesto) & (David Guetta).. As for me and my cliques, we had our freaking bad day and downside at dis year Zouk Out.

(FYI, I did not even go into the event itself) I need not say whats wrong or who to blame on that day. But what i can say is dat i should't happen at all. It's quite dissapointing but at least it's a precious lesson learned for most of my cliques.

The Moral Of the Incident is to teach us to (Trust No One but ourself) The only word to describe our feeling dat day is, (Dispensable).. We were taken in for a ride and was taken for granted bt the people we claimed to be our bestie.. Well we've already moved on. So no use ponder over useless people. My advise to those people (Whoever you are) - Get a fucking life and grow up. It does not hurt us even an inch. Instead it makes us stronger and wiser in judging human characteristic. I dun wanna say anything anymore. Dats all i can say for now.

(Kak Lin Teasing Me!!)

(Drinking Sessions In Hotel Room)

(Me & Fasha "Kak Lin GF")

(Me & My Cousin)

(New Friend "Zee Huang" & Lizza)

(Emo'ing Meeeee!!)

(Me Kena Sabo @ Carpark Pre Party Celebrations)

(My Sister Ann "Super Huge Wig" & Lizza)

(Me)

(Me & Liz)

(Halim Hashim & Waty)

(Friends No More)

(Azree & Brad)

(Kiss me thru the Fone)

(Jana JT & Me)

(Fake Smile)

(Cheers)

(Me & My Dearest Cousin Jana)

(Me & Lizza )

(Me Lying Down)

(Me With One Of Random Girls There)

(Me & Zee Cutie)

(Random)

(Me surrounded by my admirers)

(I'm in Miami Bitch)

(Sweet)

(Cousins Reunion)

(Macy's Watie & Lizza)

(In the Car On the Way To Zouk Out)

(At Pandan Reservoir)

(Random)

(Me, Jana & Lizza)

(Emoing)

(Me & Kak Lin)

(Me & Normes)

(Sweetest Side Of Me)

(Caught in the Act)

(How i wish i can be a child again)

(Act Cute)

(Reminising)

(Sabotage)

(Happy Hour)

(Cute ah Zee)

(Cleaning Up after Wine, Whisky, Vodka and Coke Shower)

(Grumbling)

(The End of The Day)

(Looking foward to great time ahead.)

Well everyone! 2010 is a freaking terrible year for me. Lots and lots of hardship and struggles. Yeah even though it seems like tons and tons of partying too, it also mean lots of spending and wasting of money on unecessary spendings. But i am really looking foward to a wonderful 2011. I really hope 2011 will be whole lot better. I'ts time for a change. A change for a better future.. Amin..

Labels: Best Friends, Birthday Party, Dispensable, Fun, Zouk Out

my say at 12/16/2010 08:40:00 PM.