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Ok Ok! I Know im getting all mushy mushy.. And it might get others disgusted.. But could you blame me? For having this type of feeling? For those people that know me well enough, i am very sure that they will be very happy for me and give me their ultimate blessing. For those who don't, i am very sorry cos you don't know me well enough.




For many years i've been living in total denial of my true self (Who i am?). I've been depriving myself of being loved cos i refused to believe in love or trust anyone. Despite my extroversion, funny personality, wide smile and grin, lively and humourous character and the strong desire of helping and pleasing others (Even to the expense of my own future and happiness) i am actually a loner..



Has anyone ever noticed that as a matter of fact, I've been living in my own world. A world of loneliness full of sorrow, sadness and pain. I kept all my troubles and sorrow within me just for the sake of pleasing others. I felt pain. I felt alone. I felt hopeless and yet no one notice. No One



And now, out of sudden, someone came by and talk to me. Befriending me, Show me concern. Love me for who i am despite of who i used to be, believe in me, expect nothing out of me except my pure love, Makes me blushed with all the praises, give me all the hopes dat i could ever wished for and most importantly for once to actually Trust me.



Oh God! It has been such a long long time since i felt so awake. Fully awake from my hidden sorrows and unhappiness. It has been such a long time since i had this feeling. A feeling i can never describe in words. A feeling that makes my heart beats fast. It is a feeling i called "LOVE"



For years i've been alone, leading this lonely life on a lonely world. And now, a special someone came into my life out of nowhere and give me a sudden surge of happiness that i've long given up upon. Give me the love i've been dying for. Can i refuse it???



Hell No!! I will never deny it or refuse it cos it is a matter of my happiness and my future. Can anyone blame me for taking this risk? Even if this is a risk that i am taking, i could even put my life on it. Because even if it's not for real and it will be gone as fast as it came, at the very least i got to feel a little bit of love and happiness. At least i wont die in vain. Die a loner..



For all these, i got one particular person to thanks. And by now, most of you guys might have an idea of who 'HE' was... Yes.. Its not a typo error. And i really mean it when i say it's a "HE". For those who know who he was, please give me your blessing and please thanks him (The special Someone) for making me your (Friend, Brother, Cousin, Enemy, Ex Lover etc etc) A happier man. He deserve every credit for putting this sincere smile on my face. This real laughter on me and this Happiness on me again.. Thank you (Thang).. Thank you for all you've done for me..



I thank you for the love which you showered upon me and i have no regrets. I will never regret knowing you, befriending you and now loving you. And i am proud to say that I LOVE YOU my darling.. And i will love you for as long as i could.. And i hope you too got this same feeling towards me.. There's nothing that i wished for but to spend the rest of my life with you and loving you.. I will have no regrets.



Best of Love

Ryan (Full of Love)

Profile

Name: Ryan'iel Hiroshi
Known As: Ryan'iel, Ryan or Afad
Day I first cried: 1st August 1982
Race: Mixed Portuguese, Malay and Hispanic
Faith: Islam
Status: Single (And available, Ready to mingle)
Profession: Asst Tower Manager (MBS)
Scene: Alternative
Style: Modern Trendy
Height: 1.68
Weight: 65kg
Complexion: Fair Complexion
Hairstyle: Trendy short, Colourful
Eyes: Black
Tattoos: Lots of it
Piercing: Both earlobes
Smoking Habit: Occasionally
Drinking Habit: Occasionally
Best Attributes: Smile, Humour & Intelligence
Hobbies: Cycling, Swimming, Jogging, Tanning, Shopping, Reading, Travelling and surfing the net.


Flamboyant, Down to earth, Clean freak, Cool, Funny, Extroverted, Friendly, Romantic, Loving, Passionate, Honest and Generous

Dat's how I extend myself 2 the world with the same basic expectations of others who wish 2 return the same courtesy.

Dat said, I pride myself in being more proactive & rational in understanding all the different charms and cultures. Never been satisfied with my own perspectives, I am usually a keen learner of different ideas - approaching them with respect, tact & an open mind.

Conflicts are usually handled objectively with diplomatic end in mind. Don't be put off by my eloquence & flamboyant character as it usually rewards more than it punish. I am comfortable in being affectionate & I am not afraid 2 show others that I care. A few kind words, a reassuring hug & compliments to go along are few ways to let my compassion show.

While I am a high maintenance guy with my vanity obsession, I have come 2 acquire a new level of appreciation 4 a no-fuss, low-drama approach with minimum “Boo-hoos” & maximum “Oh-yeah”. I may exude catlike playfulness & being mischievous at times, there lies a sentimental intellectual beneath the mild demeanour.

I don't believe in intellectual superiority though, only dormant potential in every person. Hence, there is no room for arrogance, segmented respect or condescending attitude.

My Biggest lesson in love is to “Forgive and forgo the loser.”
My Biggest lesson in life is to “Live life to the fullest and having No regrets.”

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